In Denial

Despite all my father’s attempts to get me on a raft for the past, let’s say 15 years, I finally took the plunge yesterday.   And hey, I guess I went big by starting my rafting career on the Nile River.  Some quick facts about the Nile River:

The Nile STARTS in Uganda and flows “up” to Egypt.  Now, this may seem strange because in the states most of our rivers run from North to South, so why in the world would a river run the “wrong way.”  In reality, rivers run from highest elevation to lowest, makes sense right?  Remember that remotely important concept of gravity?  Well, it’s gravity doing it’s work.  Uganda is a plateau with an average elevation of 3500 ft, and the Mediterranean Sea is, well, you got it, sea level.  Do the physics.

The source of the Nile is located in Jinja, a city that is about two hours southwest from my site.

The Nile is the longest river in the world with a length of 4,132 miles.

The Nile runs through eleven countries.

The Nile begins as two rivers, the Blue and the White Nile, which meet in Khartoum, Sudan.

So, the Nile is a pretty big deal.  Our rafting trip was a full day, grade 5 white water rafting trip.  Like I said, I know next to nothing about rafting, but a grade 6 is the highest level for rapids, so we weren’t messing around.  Needless to say, I was a little anxious about my survival.  No worries though, right?  We got lifejackets and helmets, although Audrey’s head was so small they almost couldn’t find one for her.  One of the guides said, “It’s ok.  You’ll just raft without one.”  Of course, he was joking, but I thought Audrey was going to cry from fear.  It didn’t exactly help that the safety talk included some complicated, hard-to-follow instructions, the video guy kept talking about capturing “carnage,” and I had downed three cups of complimentary coffee.  Apparently, my caffeinated anxiety is expressed in an overwhelming enthusiasm for rafting, creating cheers for my boat’s morale and teaching the guide how to do some dance moves.  I obviously take my safety very seriously.  Despite my outward nonchalant attitude, I was pretty convinced that I was going overboard and would die a horrible death in the mouth of a hippo.  My fears were not calmed when I asked my guide about the dilapidated handle on my paddle.  His response?  “Yeah.  You got a shit one, eh?”  Awesome.

In order to give us some training, we had to practice a number of rafting essentials before actually attempting a rapid.  We paddled forward, we paddled backward, we paddled in circles.  It was pretty exciting that we could stay in sync for the most part.  I credit most of our success to the married couple in front keeping a good rhythm.   You know they have good communication if they can coordinate amateurs like us.  We got to practice flipping the boat over and getting back in.  You might be shocked to know, but I was the only one that could get back into the boat by myself.  Where did this arm strength come from?  Jerry cans and yoga, baby!  You’re probably not surprised to know that I did a little victory dance.

Finally, we were ready to go.  The first rapid was actually a grade 6, so the guides took us carefully around it.  It was completely terrifying knowing that the wrong move could send us into the inferno.  Thankfully we made it, despite the fact that our guide jumped off half way down the rapid, and we all began screaming “PETER?!?!?!?!”  in fear that we would never manage without him.  Don’t worry, we managed.  Between most of the rapids, and we hit seven of them, there were usually long pools of calm water.  The scenery was beautiful and essentially indescribable.  The banks are steep, green slopes lined at the top with forests.  There are many islands within the river that are covered with vegetation.  We could take off our lifejackets and helmets, and relax- in the words of another guide “chillax.”  Where do they learn these words?  I’m guessing from tourists. 

The next rapid was supposed to be fairly easy, with no possibility of flipping over.  Whoops, I guess things didn’t exactly go to plan.  As we’re coming down, our guide yells “Get down!”  We all get down as quickly as possible, but the wave we’re up against is at least 10 ft tall, and before I know it, I’m no longer in the boat.  Actually, the entire boat is upside down.  Still holding on, thank god.  The guide quickly turns the boat over, and we’re all struggling to get back in.  He starts yelling, “GET IN THE BOAT!  QUICKLY!”  Quickly?  That does not sound good… Finally, I’m back in the boat, trying to orient myself, Audrey’s screaming bloody murder, and I realize what she sees.  We’re headed straight for a very low lying tree, and Ryan’s still not back in the boat.  We’ve got about 3 seconds to pull this guy into the boat, and as I’m yanking on his lifejacket by the shoulders, here comes the tree.  “DUCK!”  I push Ryan’s face into the boat, duck down and only managed to scrape my hands on the branches as we pass under at an alarming speed.  We were out of the clear, and all rejoiced in surviving our flip.

Even though he’s 10,000 miles away, I can hear my dad groaning as I write that rafting the Nile was such a fun and awesome experience.  Sorry dad.  I guess I’m pretty stubborn, but I think you knew that already.  Although I won’t say that the food was the best part, but we were all very excited to jump back into dry, warm clothes and load up on an awesome barbeque.  I don’t remember the last time I had a baked potato with real butter, garlic bread, a salad that actually included lettuce, barbequed meat and well-prepared green beans.  We all happily piled our plates high with hot, comforting food that we’ve been missing for the past seven months.  As part of our rafting package, we’ll be doing a sunset boat cruise down to the Source of the Nile this evening.  Just cross your fingers that it stops raining.