Out of Control

So for those of you that don't know this about me, I tend to get stuck on words and phrases, then use them nonstop until I can find another hip phrase I like.  In the past, I've gotten stuck on hilarious, horrific, ridiculous, triste, etc.  I know there are more, I just can't come up with any right now.  Well, the current favorite is out of control.  I honestly didn't know I was even using it that much until someone commented on it.  They asked me how can everything be out of control?  Well, in actuality, the last 10 weeks or so have been comletely out of control.

Let me give a brief list of things that are usually out of control here in Uganda:
-my hair.  It never seems to be neat.
-the portion sizes.  It's a struggle to finish a meal sometimes
-driving.  Chicken is not a game here, it's just how you drive
-how sharing everyone is in Uganda.  People are always willing to share meals, tea, their homes, anything with you.
-how many languages are spoken in Uganda.  54 languages!  And most people know at least 4, if not 6 or 7.
-the rain.  It rains so crazy hard here and it just gets amplified by the tin roof.

Of course, these things aren't out of control in a bad way necessarily, but it's just over the top sometimes.

On the other hand, I've been trying to figure out exactly why this phrase has entered my vocabulary now.  And, I've come to the conclusion that it's because that's how I feel right now, a serious lack of control, which I completely contribute to training.  In training, we have absolutely no say or direction in what we do each day, when we do it, what we eat, when we eat, any alone time, where we're going in country, where we'll be living etc.  We pretty much gave up all that control once we stepped on the flight to staging.  And of course, I completely understand why it has to be this way, but that doesn't mean it isn't exhausting, stressful and frustrating.  People always say that training is the hardest part of their Peace Corps service, and I'm beginning to understand why.  For the most part, the people that join Peace Corps are very independent and like to discover things themselves.  Essentially, these 10 weeks of training have been the exact opposite of that.  Maybe that's why I've suddenly starting using out of control in order to describe everything going on around me.

Needless to say, I'm very much looknig forward to going to site, to having my own space, to cooking for myself, to getting back into my exercise routine, to doing things at my own pace, to finally getting started in whatever work I'll be doing here.  I know that I'll miss my fellow trainees, my homestay family and having a schedule to follow, but right now all I can think about is getting training over with.  Tomorrow, we have a round robin type of oral exam, in which we need to be able to answer questions about anything we've covered in training, including medical, safety, cross cultural, etc.  On Friday, we have our final language evaluation.  Hopefully, I'll pass, but I'm pretty sure if I don't, they aren't going to send me home!

Last week, I visited my future site, but only briefly so I don't have too much to report about it, except my counterpart is super excited to start working with me.  My house is a work in progress to say the least, but at least it's really safe, I've got some neighbors to hang out with and I'm really looking forward to making it my own.  Hopefully, once I get to my own place, I'll finally feel a little more in control.  My hopes aren't too high for my hair though.